Watch Sandra Gongora take a shot on the lanes.

Her approach is a smooth and fluid four-step delivery, each step gradually getting longer like a rhythmic dance. The ball snaps down the lanes. It’s a form Jason Belmonte, the Now seven-time PBA Player of the Year, raves about. “It’s just beautiful to watch,” Belmonte said. “Sandra has a lot of quality with the way she throws that is entertaining to many.” 

Now watch her again.

But instead of watching her feet glide across the floor or her arm swing like a pendulum, watch her eyes right before the push away when they look towards the ball. Her eyes will, for the slightest of moments, focus on her left wrist. The wrist is wrapped in black, red and other colored bracelets that never leave her arm. But those aren’t what she is glancing at. She is looking at the three doves and scripted phrase inked on the skin right above her radius bone.

“It’s on my left wrist so when I hold my ball with the right one, I can read it. It’s just a reminder for me,” Gongora said.

Those three Latin words have been inspiring Gongora for years. But as Gongora’s life has changed over the last few years, those words have taken on additional meanings. They are no longer just a message to herself every time she steps on the lanes. They are a reminder of the mountains Gongora has climbed, the life she has created for herself and the help she wants to provide for others.

A Dream Deferred

At the start of 2020, Gongora was like a lot of people around the world: excited for a new year. It’s not like 2019 had been bad to her. It had been pretty good. While she hadn’t won a title — an accomplishment that has alluded her in her PWBA career — she did finish second at the Lincoln Open. When January 1 came around, Gongora was ready to make 2020 even better than 2019.

Then the COVID-19 pandemic spread across the world.

Information about the pandemic arrived slower to her native Mexico than the United States so Gongora said she didn’t initially realize the severity of the virus. She thought it was just going to be a month of lockdown. Gongora, who resides in a house in Monterrey, couldn’t build any makeshift lanes at her home. but she was able to exercise in her apartment. With her extra free time, she started baking, including crafting a birthday cake for her father in April. “Everything was going okay,” Gongora said.

Then the PWBA announced the 2020 season was cancelled.

“I started to feel a little — first, it was just worry,” Gongora recalls. “I was just like, oh my god, no Tour? I think I was handling it okay. I cannot really tell you what day exactly. But suddenly, one day, I didn’t want to wake up.”

Gongora felt like a black hole, like her entire life was falling in on her. She felt like she lost control of the world around her and she couldn’t fix the problems surrounding her. Her uncle died. She was scared to leave the house and catch COVID. She was afraid of what was coming next in her bowlingless world. She didn’t know what she would do.

A frequent social media poster and texter, Gongora went silent. She didn’t post on social media for two months, scared to reveal her sadness to the world. Three friends from home — Cheryl, Nancy and Yara — noticed the change in Sandra. They asked if she was OK and even scheduled weekly socially distanced card games at their houses. “I couldn’t explain to them that I was lost,” Gongora said. She kept falling deeper into what she calls a darkness and what she knows now was a depression. She started to feel empty and scared of her thoughts.

It culminated one day at her parents’ house when she told her father that she was lost, then broke down crying. Her father listened and consoled her. Gongora confided in him over the next few weeks, and her father did his best to help her. But it became clear to him that she wasn’t going to get better without the help of a specialist.

He recommended Gongora’s uncle, Fernando, a neurologist in the city. “I was even afraid to call him,” Gongora said. “I was just embarrassed, sad.” But she did contact him and went into his office to talk about what she had been feeling.

“When I interviewed her, her self-perception of her handicap was evident. She felt tired all day. She couldn’t get up and didn’t want to leave her house. Something very peculiar was that she could not concentrate and thought she was beginning to lose her memory,” Fernando said in a text.

Fernando began telling his niece that other people were feeling the same way, too. Gongora remembers him explaining the situations of other athletes and successful people who dealt with depression.

But then he asked if she ever thought of killing herself.

“When I got asked that, I got even more scared because of these thoughts that I used to have of what if it’s just better if you’re not here,” Gongora said. “When I started to have those thoughts, I didn’t do anything. I feel very relieved that I never did anything to hurt me. Because of this, I stayed, and I asked for help…I told my uncle, ‘No, not really. But I really have thought that I don’t want to be here anymore.’”

That discussion and moment stands out for Gongora in hindsight. Asking for help is difficult, she admits. Sometimes you don’t know you need help. Sometimes you are too afraid to ask for it. But when you ask for it, it is there.

Fernando and Gongora did some tests and he again emphasized to Gongora that her feelings were something others felt, too. He prescribed Gongora with antidepressants to be taken twice a day. 

“The first week, nothing changed,” Gongora said. “I felt the same. I was very desperate because I thought the pills were magic. I called my uncle. I’m like, ‘What did you give me? These things don’t work. I feel awful.’ He’s like, ‘Keep taking them. Keep taking them.”

She did, and she started to improve. She was at first skeptical of the medicine, as she says her depression made her scared of almost everything, but she says it truly worked wonders for her. 

But it wasn’t just the medicine helping. Friends and family were doing their best to help Gongora.

At the start of the pandemic, Gongora agreed to do a weekly video call with Clara Guerrero, who has been a close friend of Gongora’s for years. But Gongora stopped when her depression hit. Guerrero offered to have Gongora come to Austin, Texas — where she lives with her husband — and spend some time with them. It took a few months, but Gongora booked a flight and spent two weeks in Texas. The trip — full of golfing and hanging out with Guerrero — really helped Gongora feel better about herself and the world.

Guerrero also sparked an idea for Gongora to pick up some work in Monterrey. Guerrero said she was making money during the pandemic giving bowling lessons. Bowling centers weren’t open in Mexico at the time, but Gongora had a friend that owned a private pair of lanes. When she got back to Monterrey, he let her conduct private lessons. She earned a little bit of money, got to interact with people and regained some confidence.

“I’m just lucky to have such great friends that have helped me during these struggles,” Gongora said.

Gongora was truly starting to fly out of her depression, and she soon rediscovered an idea that would help her find a new purpose.

The Belmo Effect

Belmonte and Gongora first met about two decades ago at a youth world championship tournament. The friendship between the two started growing before the pandemic when Belmonte hired Gongora — who majored in graphic design at Wichita State and worked in the field before joining the PWBA — to create graphics for him. The partnership was a successful and beneficial one.

Belmonte contacted Gongora one day in fall 2020 to ask her if she could help him with another design project. They hopped on the phone, and an alarm bell started ringing in Belmonte’s mind. Her energy level was different. Her tone was different. “I remember asking,” Belmonte said, “‘Hey, I don’t want to pry too deep here, but are you okay?’”

Gongora responded by saying she was fine, but Belmonte couldn’t shake the feeling she was holding back. “Hey, if there’s anyone in this world that you can maybe share to, it's someone who lives on the other side of the world that you’re not going to necessarily see every day,” Belmonte recalls saying. “If you feel comfortable, you’re more than welcome to share some things with me and I can definitely keep that private.”

Gongora started to open up. Over time, Belmonte understood the depths of Gongora’s depression and the sadness that had enveloped her.

“I just heard a friend that didn’t sound right,” Belmonte said, reflecting on the situation. “It doesn’t matter if we live in separate continents or if you live next door to me, if you’re a friend of mine and you don’t sound right, I’m going to ask the question, ‘Are you okay?’ If that answer doesn’t suffice for me, then I’m gonna help you.”

In the case of Gongora, Belmonte felt the best way for him to help his friend was to try and revive her artistic juices. Belmonte encouraged Gongora, who struggled to even open her computer, to start being creative again. To find something to motivate her and give her a purpose to do something that day. Then someone mentioned an old project Gongora had been working on before the pandemic.

That’s how Volat resurfaced in Gongora’s life.

Volat is Born

It was 2018, and Gongora couldn’t look away. She was in Japan on a promotional tour for Columbia 300, one of her sponsors. At one of the stops on the tour — she doesn’t remember where — Gongora saw a woman wearing a bowling dress that looked like a long polo with the woman’s name on the back. 

Gongora looked at her and realized she wanted that for herself. The seed for her own brand Volat and its signature item, the dream dress, was planted.

The process for creating the brand was a slow one — Gongora did not have many connections to help expedite the process. It took her a while to get all the information necessary and forms filled and processed. On top of all that, she couldn’t think of a name for the company. 

Then one day, she looked down at her right wrist and saw the three birds and saw Alis volat propriis written in ink. Volat, which translates to fly, hit her like a tsunami. She ran to the government organization in charge of trademarks.

This all happened before the pandemic, so when Belmonte and Gongora started talking about the brand, all that paperwork was handled. She even had a patent for the dream dress — her bowling polo dress creation. Gongora hadn’t pursued the project too intensively before the pandemic because she didn’t have the money and, since patents in Mexico last for 10 years, she figured she had time. Now with Belmonte pushing her to return to the brand and pursue the passion, Gongora, still in the haze of her depression, didn’t feel capable of doing it.

But Belmonte would have none of that. 

“I finally turned on my computer, looked at the files and, little by little, I started to see light,” Gongora said. That improvement was noticeable to Belmonte on the other side of the world. “I could sense that she started to feel a little better,” Belmonte said. “I don’t think she was cured by any stretch of the imagination. But definitely was on the mend.”

Belmonte suggested a deadline for Gongora to complete some work to help motivate her, and Gongora started grinding away. She sent some designs to Belmonte. He loved them. She grew confident and realized she didn’t just want to design a dress for herself. She wanted others to wear it too.

Belmonte agreed, and suggested she go beyond just the dresses and do all types of apparel. She wanted to do it, but was nervous because of her lack of business experience. Belmonte said he would be happy to be a partner on the project and help her on that side of the business.

He helped Gongora get a meeting with Coolwick founder Cliff Barnes. Gongora explained Volat, her journey and her goals for the company. The two had a couple of phone calls and an in-person meeting in January 2021.

Barnes was clear and honest with Gongora about Coolwick’s expectations for Volat. He wanted commitment and investment from Gongora. He would be looking at her actions rather than her words.

That was fine with Gongora. She wanted someone to push her.

“We shared a lot of the same vision as far as what we wanted to do with Coolwick and Volat,” Barnes said. “We really liked her story and what she was all about. We just wanted to help her progress and help her dream become a reality.”

Belmonte said he didn’t hesitate at all in his decision to assist Gongora and Volat. One reason was that he believed in the project. He saw the potential for growth in the company.

The other reason goes back to their friendship. One time Belmonte was very thankful after Gongora assisted with a project. She responded with the adage, one Belmonte had never heard before, of “I just like to pay with the same coin.” It’s something Belmonte has taken with him since that encounter. In Volat, Belmonte saw an opportunity to pay with a same coin.

That coin has been a great investment. Gongora has labored hard over the past two years on the project. She has gone beyond just designing dresses, creating t-shirts, polos, sweatshirts and more. Volat has collaborated with Belmonte, Verity Crawley and Diana Zavjalova on merchandise drops, including a widely popular “Make Them Fly” limited edition collection with Belmonte. Jesper Svensson and Stefanie Johnson also have collaborations coming soon. 

“You can tell the time that she takes on designing the brands and how it’s really important for her to make sure that every piece that she designs has a part of her or whoever she’s working with. She’s trying to tell her story, or whoever she’s working with’s story, through the apparel,” Barnes said.

The design skills have been there, but it has been on the business side where Gongora has seen the most growth. At the beginning, she relied a lot on Belmonte for advice and guidance about how to navigate the unchartered waters she was entering.

It is still unchartered waters, but Gongora is a steady and confident hand on the command. She knows what she wants and she is determined to make it happen.

“This has not been an easy journey for her,” Belmonte said of Gongora’s last few years. “It’s been very emotional. I think that’s another reason why, as a friend and as a business partner, to see the brand growing and have some success is super satisfying and rewarding because you get to see it from a different perspective. You get to see it from the beginning to the end.”

The Interview that Shook the Bowling World

Gongora was having a good day — a great one, in fact.

It was an October day last year and Gongora was in Reno, Nevada, participating in the first day of the PWBA Pepsi Classic. Volat had just been released and she was wearing one of her dresses on the lanes. She was just having fun, doing what she loved to do. Scores weren’t even on her mind.

But then she realized that she was the first-round leader, which meant she had to go do an interview with PERSON1 and PERSON2. She scooted on over to the interview station and put on the headset. As her face popped up live on video, she had a smile that could shine through a thick afternoon mist in London.

“I’m doing good,” Gongora said to the duo, who were broadcasting remotely. “I am actually very happy. I wasn’t looking at the scores and I think I’m leading.”

“Would you say that this is the best, maybe, stretch of bowling that you’ve done on tour this season including Reno Classic?” PERSON said. “Even though yesterday didn’t go well but overall, you had a top 10 finish and obviously you get off to a great start today. Would you say it’s the best stretch for you so far?”

“For sure,” Gongora started. But then she paused. It was short, less than a second long, and concluded with a slight breath — the type of silence someone takes before they decide whether to let you cross the Rubicon into their thoughts or stay on the other side.


A year prior, that pause wouldn’t have led to a deep reflection. Gongora likely would have kept her emotions inside. Not this time. “I know a lot of people are watching, hopefully,” she continued.

For the next few minutes, Gongora shared her story with the broadcasters and fans watching. She talked about her struggles during the pandemic, feeling lost and how Volat has given her a new purpose in the world.

“I was just sharing,” Gongora said. “The next day a lot of the girls reached out to me and they gave me hugs. Some of them were very sweet because nobody knew. It felt good to share.”

Her long-time friend Zavjalova also dealt with depression during the pandemic, and hearing Gongora’s story at the tournament resonated with her. She went up to Gongora, gave her a hug and told her she is not alone. Now, Zavjalova is a member of the Volat team. “I just wanted to help her out and be part of her journey because I could relate to what she was going through,” Zavjalova said.

It wasn’t just her fellow professionals reaching out either. People from across the world identified with the message and connected with Gongora, sending kind comments and thanking her for her vulnerability.

While the brand’s focus is on apparel, Gongora is also focused on elevating Volat as an outlet for people struggling with their mental health. She is so thankful for the people around her who helped her through her depression, and she wants to pay it forward for others in the bowling community. If people reach out to her or Volat, Gongora said she will listen and provide resources to help them.

For people working on or collaborating with Volat like Barnes and Belmonte, the opportunity to work with a brand that is so focused on giving back is extremely rewarding. Barnes said it’s fulfilling on a deeper level, and many on the Coolwick team feel their lives enriched by helping.

There’s a lot of pride watching Gongora fight for her passion, Belmonte said. Because when it gets difficult and challenging, Gongora doesn’t back down.

“It doesn’t matter how bad it gets or how bad it feels, you can fly yourself out there,” Belmonte said. “You can fly yourself out of it. You can find yourself again. You can reinvent yourself. You can be happy.”

A More Balanced Life

Gongora says she is currently the happiest she has ever been in her life. She is still taking medication but has reduced the dosages. Volat is continuing to grow and Gongora’s confidence and prowess on the business side of the venture is increasing. She still loves designing, and she still loves being on the lanes.

But one thing is missing from her life right now, and it’s the thing that’s been missing from it since the PWBA re-started again in 2015: that elusive PWBA Tour title.

But people around her believe it is coming soon. “She’s about to break through out there,” Barnes said. “I wouldn’t be very surprised if she had a year where she popped off a few titles.” Belmonte agreed: “It would not surprise me at all if she becomes very successful on the lanes for a long period of time.”

For so many years, Gongora felt the pressure of not having a title to her name, of not having a trophy to lift above her head to the adoration of cheering spectators. It would hurt her when people would question her inclusion as a non-title winning bowler in certain events or promotions.

That’s no longer the case. Now, Gongora wants everyone to know that this doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about bowling anymore or she’s going to stop grinding. Not at all. She still wants to turn her dream into reality.

But there’s something else that deeply matters to her. She cares so much about Volat, the clothing and apparel she designs, the mission behind the brand. Her life, which during her depression felt inflexibly tied to the sport, has more balance.

“I used to put a lot of pressure in bowling because, as many people say, I’m one of the only ones that haven’t won a title on tour,” Gongora said. “At this point, I don’t want to say I don’t care because I’ll continue to work hard because it's a dream. But as I told the guys from the PWBA in one of the interviews, I just want to be there. I just want to be bowling with the best people in the world. Win or not win, I’m alive and I’m just there experiencing what I love the most and, on the side, I am wearing something I created.”

And it’s led to a realization. 

“Maybe I’m not here to win titles. Maybe I’m just here to help people.”

In 2014, Gongora was working as a graphic designer in Mexico City in addition to her bowling exploits. When she heard the PBWA Tour was coming back, Gongora decided to go all-in on a career as a professional. To mark this dedication to herself, she decided to get a tattoo on her left wrist. A constant reminder to herself before sending her bowling ball down the lane hoping to send 10 pins flying.

But now it’s also a constant reminder of how she flew out of the darkness. A constant reminder of the friends and family who helped her along the way. A constant reminder of how she wants to help others through similar struggles.

Alis volat propriis

She flies with her own wings — but Sandra Gongora doesn’t plan on going alone.